


A Star In Someone Else's Sky

by GSKashmir



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: 1990s, Amethyst loves grunge, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, F/F, Fluff and Angst, Gay, Grunge, Homophobia, Human AU, Ice Skating, Low Self Esteem, Mutual Pining, Pearl is stuck in the 80s, Sad, Winter, in the 90s you didnt have to be a lesbian to wear flannel but it sure helped, maine
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-27
Updated: 2020-05-10
Packaged: 2020-10-29 04:17:10
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 12,106
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20790509
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GSKashmir/pseuds/GSKashmir
Summary: It's 1997 and Amethyst works the evening shift in a 24/7 convenience store in a ritzy town in mid-coast Maine.  She's been pretty alone most of her life and just kind of accepted that's how things are.  But one evening, she's absolutely awestruck by the sight of a lone skater on a frozen pond near the parking lot.  Her heart has been so cold for so long, and even if she won't admit it, she really hopes that this skater is the one who's going to warm it up again.





	1. All Apologies

On this cold Winter night in Maine, Amethyst was certain of only one thing: If she heard “I’ll Be There For You” one more time, she was going to scream.

Her shift at “Prime Time Pit-Stop” was supposed to have ended ten whole minutes ago, but here she remained, forced to listen to songs that were popular two years ago because getting a new CD would be too much trouble for the store's manager. This was Lars’ fault. He used to actually have excuses, but at this point, he’d been late so often that he just stopped bothering. Just as well, Amethyst figured. It’s not like she would have believed him anyway.

Amethyst glared angrily at the digital display on the time clock. 12:11 AM, it glared back. She normally wouldn’t have been so upset. In fact, she was late only a little bit less often than Lars. Though, ever since that Sadie girl started working, she couldn’t bring herself to keep that behavior up. That girl was just so nice. But tonight was different. She had recently saved up enough money to buy herself a brand new Nintendo 64. It was a Christmas present to herself that she’d been looking forward to for a while, and the ritzy town of Arcadia where she worked afforded her a bit of extra cash that she wouldn’t have been able to get if she got a job closer to home. The half-hour commute wasn’t so bad of a trade off.

12:12 AM.

Amethyst’s foot began to tap unconsciously. She was getting restless. She just beat Boba Fett in Star Wars: Shadows Of The Empire before coming in, and she was very eager to get back to her game. The weather forecast was also not great for this time of night (she expected some snow on her way home), but Amethyst’s priorities put video games first. She figured her old El Camino would be able to handle the snow anyway.

12:14 AM.

Amethyst actually growled involuntarily. She didn’t mean to, and quickly looked around for any customers afterward, but there was no one to be found. The store was usually pretty dead this late at night. Once it got to 10 o’clock, there was a solid chance you’d be by yourself the rest of the evening. This used to bother Amethyst, and she brought a book or a magazine to each shift early on, but she got too absorbed in what she was reading, leading to a few instances of a customer scaring her half to death. She would laugh it off, but she was always embarrassed by it. Even if she wouldn’t show it.

Lars was really beginning to piss her off. She had gathered her coat, her bag, and even bought herself a bag of chips and a slurpee for an evening of gaming, but she was beginning to think Lars was going to call in sick and she would have to pull a double. If that happened, she might just slash his tires the next time he showed up. Then he’d be stuck there.

The thought made her laugh, but she immediately felt guilty. It was kind of a mean thing to do. Even if he did deserve it.

12:13 AM.

“Wha?!”

She blinked a few times and saw the clock actually said 12:15 AM. She breathed a long sigh of relief. Her eyes must be getting tired from the fluorescent bulbs that hummed all hours of the day. It was a nice distraction, that small flood of endorphins that came with realizing time didn’t just move backwards at the end of a work day. Was it silly to be worried that time just jumped? Sure. But the relief was still real.

No sooner had the clock changed than Lars finally appeared. Amethyst must not have noticed the headlights during her small bout of panic. She stared daggers into his face as he strolled back behind the counter, hands in his pockets and lit cigarette in his mouth.

“So wonderful for His Majesty to grace us with his presence.” She had put on a British accent to really get her point across.

Lars shrugged and snuffed his cigarette out on the underside of his right sneaker, leaving ash on the floor that Sadie would probably clean up the next day. There were cigarette burns all over the sole of that particular shoe, so this was nothing new for him.

“Amethyst, do you really want me to waste your time with an excuse or would you rather finally be on your way home?”

Lars must have had a point, considering Amethyst had already clocked out and was headed out the door by the time he finished his sentence.

Amethyst hurriedly fumbled through her bag, trying to find her car keys. Sure, she could have organized things ahead of time, but where was the fun in that? Besides, she had already used her executive function for the day gathering her coat and other belongings before Lars showed up. She did, however, need to be careful. The parking lot, as small as it was, could still be icy sometimes, and even though she’d fallen on her ass more times than she could count, she really didn’t want to spill her slurpee. Her oversized boots didn’t help things, but she loved them too much to get rid of. They were only a few sizes too big anyway, and they were warmer than anything else she’d ever used. (She also sometimes would stomp around the store like a dinosaur when she got bored out of her mind around 11:00. The last hour of work did crazy things to a person.) 

Suddenly, her fingers touched metal. Success. Slightly rusty car keys in hand, Amethyst tried to unlock her car, but all of the other things she was holding made that very difficult. With an inward sigh, she placed all of her precious cargo on the roof of her car. This was getting ridiculous, all she wanted to do was get home. This entire day seemed to drag on forever. The hours felt like days, and those last extra fifteen minutes were an eternity. On top of all of that, the snow had already begun to fall. Getting home was going to be annoying, but once she was there, it was video games until bedtime.

At least, that was the plan. But as is true for even the most organized and thoughtful person in the world, sometimes, plans change.

This was the case for Amethyst, as she felt her gaze drifting toward the strangest sound of metal scraping against ice. She turned toward the sound almost unconsciously, as if she were scratching an itch that her brain had, but now that she scratched it, she found herself unable to tear her eyes away.

Roughly fifty feet away from Amethyst’s car, beyond the guard rail and down a small hill, there was a pond, now frozen by the cold and frosty air that the new year had brought with it. It was flanked on one side by various types of pine trees that signaled the beginnings of a vast forest just beyond. Amethyst saw it when she came in for work in the late afternoon when the sun was still up, but tonight, it was lit up solely by the high-beams of a light pink 1980’s Chevy Camaro. That was peculiar, but not quite as peculiar as the figure who seemed to glide across the pond with relative ease. She skated with effortless grace, not carrying out anything too elaborate, but just enough for any observer to see how truly talented she really was. The snow fell gently around this skater, casting small shadows everywhere thanks to the headlights of her car.

The image was breathtaking. It was strange, almost eerie in a kind of “David Lynch, Twin Peaks” sort of way, but more than any of that, it was beautiful. It was the kind of scene that one would witness and something about it would stay with them for years to come, almost like it was important for some reason, even though in the grand scheme of things, it really shouldn’t matter at all. But to Amethyst, this moment right now, it was everything.

Goosebumps raised on her arms, not from the cold, but from the events unfolding on the pond so close to her. Every pirouette, every pose, every movement etched a spot in Amethyst’s memory. The skater’s old path on the ice would fade after some time thanks to the snow, but she was constantly making a new one to take its place.

She was a taller girl, though it was difficult to really tell from this distance. She had the strangest peach colored hair, like she was a golden blonde and didn’t bleach long enough before trying to go for full on pink. It was short, and almost had a slicked-back look to it, though Amethyst wasn’t sure if that was because it was frozen or not. She was wearing a pair of almost purple jeans and had faded pink leg warmers on her calves. Her jacket used to be a bright cyan, but had been made less bright after what one could only assume was too many trips through the wash.

She was striking.

Amethyst was completely taken by everything, totally immersed in the bouquet of sensations that came with this wonderful experience. She was blushing under her hat, betraying the numbness in her face from the inhospitable gusts of wind.

So many questions were running through her mind. Who is this skater? Why is she here? What is happening to me right now? How long have I been standing here?

That last question really needed an answer. She looked down at her wrist watch, pressing a small button on the side which illuminated the digital screen.

1:04 AM

She blinked. She blinked again. The time didn’t change.

What just happened? Did time just _actually_ skip?

Amethyst didn’t think it did.

She slowly opened her car door, her mind clearly elsewhere. She started her engine and almost drove away before she remembered all of her belongings on the roof. She quickly grabbed it and brought it all inside before she buckled her seatbelt, turned on her headlights, and pulled out of the parking lot. The snow was coming down, but she hardly paid it any attention.

The ride home was silent. Amethyst didn’t turn on her radio. Instead, she replayed the image of that skater on the ice, over and over in her head. She didn’t want to forget any part of it. She wasn’t sure why, she didn’t know what it was that captivated her like that. Well, that’s not entirely true. She had an idea. But that particular idea just wasn’t in the cards for her. She learned that lesson a long time ago. So instead of rewinding her Pearl Jam “Vs” cassette tape and blaring “Dissident” as loud as she could, she rewound that memory. Then she did it again. And again.

What the Hell even was that? She couldn’t make sense of it. She was frozen in place, just watching this phantasmagorical image as it unfolded. There was no real goal, no real point, she was just enraptured from the moment her brain made sense of what she was witnessing.

It made her feel warm. Even when it was below freezing outside.

Amethyst arrived at her apartment in Boothberg at about 1:30 in the morning. Considering what she did for a living, her apartment was pretty nice. Walking through the front door, one would see in order from left to right a kitchenette/dining room combination, a hallway, and a living area, and a small balcony. The kitchenette had an electric stove, a pantry, a refrigerator, a microwave that could be old enough to cause radiation poisoning, a sink, and a dishwasher. The living room had an L shaped couch, a matching ottoman, a large CRT television, and a sliding door to the balcony that had large, vertical venitian blinds. The floor was covered in a beige carpet that was covered in nicotine stains from before Amethyst moved in, and she did her best to cover the largest ones with gaudy rugs she found at flea markets.

Amethyst moved forward, into the hallway. On the left, there was a closet and a bathroom. To the right, there were two bedrooms. One was furnished very sparsely, having a neatly made bed, a table, a lamp, and a dresser. The other, Amethyst’s room, had less of a bed and more of a mattress on the floor. Being short made that decision pretty optimal. There was also a table, a radio, a dated stereo system, a rack of CDs and cassette tapes, a dresser with unfolded clothes peeking out of it, and too many posters to count. Most of the bands on them were modern, there was a lot of Soundgarden, Alice In Chains, Temple of The Dog, Primus, but outnumbering all of them by a large margin was Pearl Jam.

Amethyst disrobed quickly, kicking off her shoes in the general direction of her dresser. One went underneath, but another rolled the wrong way. Amethyst either didn’t notice or didn’t care. Other clothes began to fall similarly. She really just wanted to go to bed, as the time she was going to spend playing video games was largely taken up by watching the skater. If she wanted, she could have spent the last half hour before her usual bedtime to play some more of her Star Wars game, but she just wasn’t in the mood. When she was down to her panties, she stuck her arms out and fell onto her bed, flat on her stomach. She groaned into her pillow as a lot of thoughts began worming their way into her head.

The memory of that moment was firmly in place. She wanted that. But that wasn’t really all she wanted, and really, Amethyst already knew that. She wanted to know more about that skater. She knew that all she wanted was to walk down there and tell that girl how amazing her skating was, but she also knew that if she did that, the most likely outcome was a very ugly rejection. Really, she thought to herself, why would anybody like that want anything to do with someone like her? No, this was fine. She told herself over and over, this was fine. It had to be fine.

It wasn’t fine, however. As she slowly drift off to sleep, her thoughts were filled with self-deprecation and an intense longing that she tried desperately to subdue. Happiness and companionship? That wasn’t something Amethyst was allowed to have. At least, that’s what she thought. That’s what she told herself because the few times she tried to have friends, it was taken from her in some form or another. And if it wasn’t taken from her, it was never given to her in the first place. Her best friends were video games, food, and Pearl Jam. She tried very hard to convince herself that was good enough.

It wasn’t.

Deep down, she knew that. If she didn’t, she wouldn’t be spending extra money for an apartment with two bedrooms. Subconsciously, she was hoping someone would want to be her roommate. She was hoping someone would want to be her friend.

But it hardly mattered anyway. She would go to work tomorrow for the evening-to-morning shift like always, she would say hi to Sadie on her way in, give Lars the cold shoulder on the way out, and she would come home and play video games until she fell asleep. Same plans as always.

But for Amethyst, this plan would also change.

Amethyst found herself in a very similar situation the next evening. Lars was late again, but Amethyst had too much on her mind to really care. Even if she did, Lars was only about five minutes late this time, so it’s not like she would have been that angry anyway. At least he decided to show up today.

The day was largely void of anything too exciting. A few customers here and there, but the Winter wasn’t a great time for business. Most of the snowbirds had flown south for the season and were now sipping champagne on the deck of a cruise ship somewhere off the coast of Florida. Amethyst laughed at the thought of old retirees binging on alcohol and then swinging the night away. But the thoughts of seniors getting down and dirty faded throughout the day and her brain sort of snapped the events of last night into place, right where they should be. It was a one-time thing. She was very glad it happened, but it was over now. She should be thankful she witnessed what she did.

But as she approached her car for the commute home that evening, she let out a small gasp. The telltale sound of steel scraping against ice was ringing through the air yet again. With a bit more pep in her step, she moved quickly to the same spot she observed the night before.

It was just as beautiful, even without the snowfall. In fact, without the bad weather, Amethyst was able to see _her_ a lot more clearly. And she was beautiful.

Though she wore the same outfit as yesterday, Amethyst could see details on her skin that she hadn’t noticed the previous evening. Her face bore an expression of maybe not joy, but content, as though this was something special to her that she’d been wanting to do for a while. Her skin was porcelain, almost like a doll. Amethyst wasn’t sure if it was the lack of sun this early in the year or if her skin was just like that. Not that it really mattered, but Amethyst couldn’t help herself from wanting to know more.

But Amethyst’s pining would continue. For the rest of her work week and almost all of the next, Amethyst would repeat this routine. Wake up, pass the time for four hours or so, go to work, wait impatiently for the shift to end, spend another hour watching this amazing skater swirling and dancing across the ice, go home, sleep, and repeat. Really, the only thing that changed from that first encounter was that Amethyst allowed herself some music on the ride home. She figured if she was going to see the skater every day, then cementing that memory wasn’t as important as soaking in the experience.

It was unhealthy. Amethyst knew this, but she couldn’t bring herself to care. It was one of the few things she looked forward to every day and she wouldn’t let anybody take it away from her, no matter how bad for her it was.

Sadly, this decision was taken away from Amethyst.

One Thursday evening, about halfway through their nightly ritual, she was watching the skater as she usually did. Amethyst had a smile on her face and that same warmth she felt the previous week hadn’t faltered at all since then. Suddenly, and without warning, the skater angled her skates into the ice and stopped completely. She stared directly at Amethyst, making as much eye contact as one could from such a distance away. Her expression wasn’t the same content Amethyst had noticed before, now it was accusatory and cold.

Amethyst gasped in surprise and tried her hardest to turn it into a cough in case the skater could hear her. She fumbled with her keys, clearly embarrassed, dove into her car, and then left the parking lot as quickly as she possibly could. Almost as if her car’s tape player knew what was going to happen tonight, she had left Pearl Jam’s “Vitalogy” in, and “Not For You” had begun playing as soon as she turned it on.

A string of expletives erupted from Amethyst’s mouth, partly out of anger and partly out of panic. She couldn’t believe what just happened. That look wasn’t surprise, that look was a message. A message that said “This isn’t the first time I noticed you.” How long had the skater known Amethyst was watching? How long had she wanted Amethyst to stop?

The more she thought about it, the more she hated herself. Part of her considered that if the skater wanted Amethyst not to watch, she would have said something sooner, but that just kind of felt like blaming the victim for being stalked. That is, after all, what she was. A stalker.

She sighed and let Eddie Vedder’s voice calm her down as much as it always could. That night, for the first time since the previous week, as she tried to fall asleep, she couldn’t help but shed some tears into her pillow. 

Things were back to normal.

But when Amethyst got off work the next night, she couldn’t help but look to the frozen pond, just to see if _she_ was still there. To Amethyst’s surprise, she wasn’t. It was odd, however, that the pond was still illuminated by the headlights of that same pink Chevy Camaro-

“Hey!”

Her voice rang out sharply into the cold and quiet night air, and Amethyst nearly jumped out of her skin. She whipped around and was greeted with something equal parts beautiful and terrifying.

The skater. She stood only a few feet away and had fire in her eyes. It didn’t help that she also had a good foot and a half on Amethyst. She looked like a territorial jungle cat, ready to claw at anything that came near, and Amethyst had gotten just a bit too close.

“You wanna tell me why you’ve been ogling me for the past week?”

Amethyst’s heart began pumping battery acid as she stumbled over herself, trying desperately to say something. _Anything._

“I-I… Uh… You’re just really good…! Yeah! I um. I like to skate too…? It’s a hobby of mine…” she followed that with the word “apparently” under her breath. “I was just admiring your ah… Form! Yeah. You looked great pulling off those ah… ‘sow cows.’”

Amethyst was almost impressed with herself. She knew a skating term from somewhere or other and was able to pull it out of her brain in the biggest pinch she’d found herself in recently.

The skater stared at Amethyst incredulously. “You? A skater? There are two things wrong with that statement. First, it’s pronounced ‘salchow,’ of which I performed _none_ since I was a girl. Second, I don’t think figure skates come in size fourteen.”

She gestured to Amethyst’s hand-me-down boots. They were way too big for her, but they were so incredibly warm and water-resistant that she just never bothered to get new ones.

“Hey!” she shot back, “These ain’t clown shoes, I’m only a size 10!”

The skater’s face contorted into a very tight look, a combination of disgust and confusion.

“Oh, that is so not even the point right now!”

Amethyst shrunk down into her jacket and suddenly found the ground extremely interesting. She didn’t think things could get any worse, so she sighed and decided to go for broke.

“I’ve been watching you for almost two weeks now… B-but it wasn’t anything creepy, I swear! You’re just… You’re really really good at it. Seriously, the first night I saw you, it was snowing a little, and you had the pond all lit up with your car and I just couldn’t look away… You’re really talented and it shows. It was just a beautiful thing to see. I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable…”

Amethyst’s eyes moved to judge the skater’s face. If she didn’t know any better, she’d say the skater was blushing. Amethyst’s head moved out of her jacket a little, hopeful that maybe things were going to be okay. Maybe she was wrong this time. Maybe the ugly rejection wasn’t going to happen. Maybe-

“W-well… Just stop it, okay?! I don’t like it!” She practically spat the words at Amethyst.

The smaller girl whimpered out a small noise followed by a very pitiful “...Okay… I’m sorry, I-I get it… I mean someone like me-” she paused, her voice hitching. She steadied herself before finishing her workday off with the words “It won’t happen again.”

The skater’s face softened slightly, but Amethyst didn’t notice. She sniffled a little, and it wasn’t clear if it was because of the cold or that whole mess that just happened. It didn’t matter, anyway. She didn’t want to be there anymore, and clearly the feeling was mutual. Amethyst got in her car and pulled out onto the street, heading home, leaving a perplexed and guilty-looking figure skater in the parking lot.

The next week, Amethyst had settled into her usual routine. Wake up, screw around, go to work, come home, screw around again, sleep, repeat. There was a slight difference now, however. “Screw around” was replaced with “try really hard not to cry.” So maybe it wasn’t so much of a usual routine as it was an older one that tended to rear its ugly head up from time to time.

Her work days had gone from slow to an absolute slog. She used to have something to look forward to, but that was gone. She chided herself for even thinking that something as incredible and beautiful as what she witnessed that night could ever be for someone like her. She had a tendency to forget that and every single time it would blow up in her face.

Every evening, as she walked to her car, she still heard the sounds of the skater as she glided across the ice. It afforded Amethyst a modicum of happiness that she didn’t ruin the skater’s evenings entirely. It would have crushed her if the skater stopped showing up altogether just because of her.

However, one day, when Amethyst walked into work as the sun had begun to set, she saw a box wrapped in newspaper on the counter next to Sadie. It had a bow made of twine around it and there was a small note attached. Amethyst assumed that it had to belong to her coworker, but Sadie had a weird kind of smile on her face as she noticed Amethyst coming inside. Amethyst paused in front of the counter before walking back to the time clock.

“Uhhhh whatcha got there, Sades?”

Sadie giggled as Amethyst punched in.

“I’m surprised you don’t already know. Someone was looking for you on your day off yesterday.”

Amethyst raised an eyebrow. She didn’t really _know_ anyone other than Sadie and Lars. Sure, Amethyst had interacted with the incredibly uptight and possibly evil store manager before, but surely if _that_ was the person looking for her, Sadie wouldn’t look so happy. Or maybe she secretly hated Amethyst. Sounded reasonable enough. But if she were really about to be fired, she probably wouldn’t be getting a present.

“What did they want…?” She asked, suspicious about literally everything that was happening right now.

“To give you this present,” Sadie replied simply. 

As Amethyst walked back behind the counter, Sadie slid the box over to her. Amethyst managed to grab it before it fell off the side. While Sadie was clocking out, Amethyst stared warily at the box. This was going to be a weird day, she could feel it already. She gave a quick look around the store for any customers she might recognize, because maybe it was a regular that she’d talked to a few times who was leaving a late Christmas present for her. Stranger things have happened.

After Sadie had left the store and driven away, and just as Amethyst ripped the newspaper off the box, she quickly discovered that this was one of those stranger things.

It was a shoebox. A little old, slightly worn, but a shoebox nonetheless. She took the lid off and, after moving a few more pieces of newspaper out of the way, she saw a pair of clearly used, size 10, white figure skates.

She stared at them as she realized immediately who sent them. Just like the first time she saw her, Amethyst was again dumbstruck. Her brain went into overdrive trying to come up with reasons why this was happening, but when she remembered the box came with a note, she scrambled to grab it, almost knocking the skates off the counter. She opened it quickly and saw, written in elegant cursive with a blue permanent marker,

_Midnight. No clown shoes. -Pearl_


	2. I Stay Away

Pearl was skating in a circle for most of the evening rather than her usual process of figure eights, spelling things in cursive, and other intricacies. Skating in a circle is what you do when you have something on your mind. When you don’t need to focus on anything too complicated, you can just let the scenery wash over you as you pass by it again and again. By midnight, the number of times she circled the pond was somewhere in the triple digits. Not that she was counting.

She felt extremely guilty for doing what she did to that girl from the convenience store. Sure, Pearl had run into her fair share of creeps and she had a system for dealing with them, but this was different. In every previous instance of stalking, the perpetrator would usually approach her directly at some point. This was the first time Pearl noticed them before things got that far. In addition, every confrontation led to her being insulted, called a tease, or outright violence. For the latter of those scenarios, she carried a dagger in her pocket. She found it at a tourist-trap shop somewhere down South next to a few larger replica weapons. She bought the dagger over a standard pocket knife because, frankly, if a creep sees you carrying what looks like something an English knight would carry into battle, they tend to steer clear. It cost her most of the money she had at the time, but in exchange for that kind of protection, it was worth it. Besides, she wouldn’t have bought it if she hadn’t found herself in a situation where she needed it before, so she felt she was being appropriately cautious.

But this time, none of what she usually experienced really happened. Pearl initiated step one, which was to make yourself not worth the trouble, but it didn’t really seem like _that_ girl was going to try anything. And when confronted, she may have weasled around it a little, but she was mostly up front with what she was doing. On top of that, the girl actually _ apologized_. That’s something that had never happened before.

It also helped that she wasn’t a creepy _guy_. Pearl wasn’t a misandrist or anything like that, but in her experience, they were the only ones who ever tried to bother her. So when she heard that sniffling sound after chewing out the poor cashier, Pearl felt lower than dirt. A feeling that only got worse every passing night. True to her word, the girl stopped watching. The only things Pearl had seen of her since then were her car’s headlights as she pulled out of the parking lot.

This was a bridge she wanted to mend. That girl didn’t deserve what Pearl did. Sure, watching every night was creepy, but Pearl could have just asked politely for her to stop instead of getting up in her face about it. And if it really turned out that she didn’t mean any harm, Pearl wouldn’t be uncomfortable with her watching.

So here Pearl was, skating in a circle, her heart in a knot in her chest, waiting for the short, pudgy cashier with the long, lilac hair from the convenience store to come down and go skating with her. She wasn’t sure that the girl would even show up. At least, that’s what Pearl told herself. If she _really_ believed that, the pond wouldn’t have a giant letter “O” scratched onto its frozen surface.

As a rule, Pearl usually didn’t do any jumps on the ice. She was content to keep her repertoire of moves down to a few spins here and there most nights, but when she heard the sound of a car door slamming shut from the parking lot of the store, there was a moment where she found herself with a good two or three inches between her skates and the ice below her. Her figure-skating skill allowed her to stay standing, but it didn’t stop her heart from almost leaving her chest. She figured turnaround was fair play considering how badly she frightened that poor girl about a week ago. Pearl turned her head toward the sound, but didn’t stop skating. She was able to spot the cashier jump the metal guard rail that separated the parking lot from the hill next to the pond. She had begun walking down the hill slowly, like she was afraid she was going to fall. At that point, Pearl had gone too far around the circle and couldn’t keep an eye on that scene, so she kept skating until she was able to see it again. Enough time had passed up to that point that the girl had gotten right to the edge of the pond. On her feet were a pair of clearly used, size 10, white figure skates.

Peal kept going. Even though she just had about three hours to come up with what she was going to do or say if the cashier actually showed up, her brain had kind of stopped working, so she just kept doing what she was doing and made another pass around the pond. When the cashier came back into view, Pearl knew immediately that she had been told a lie. That girl _definitely_ had no idea how to skate.

Pearl readjusted her path so she would glide right over to the cashier, but before she made it, the poor girl had fallen down on her butt. She made a slight groan and tried to stand up again fairly quickly afterward, but the ice made that endeavor pretty much impossible.

When it happened, Pearl was only a couple yards away. She cringed slightly, but then was unable to stop herself from giggling. After all, the cashier _did say_ that she knew how to skate.

“I thought you said you loved skating,” Pearl said between giggles.

The cashier looked up at her with a sour expression, clearly embarrassed, and replied, “Alright… I’ma head out.”

Pearl panicked slightly and immediately responded with “No, please…” and extended her hand.

The cashier hesitated for a moment, but eventually took it and allowed Pearl to help her to her feet. Once she was up, Pearl didn’t let go.

It was slow going, but with Pearl taking the lead, the two of them were able to pick up a respectable pace around the pond. It was, however, surprisingly quiet as they got to that point. The cashier didn’t say anything to Pearl, and Pearl was too afraid she’d make things worse if she said anything at all, so she kept her mouth shut.

The two continued around the circle for ten whole minutes like this before the cashier finally broke the silence.

“Why did you give me these…?”

The question had a strange energy to it that Pearl couldn’t quite put her finger on. It was sort of like the cashier didn’t understand why Pearl thought she was worth the effort. The knot in Pearl’s heart got tighter. But that wasn’t something that you would unpack with a total stranger, so Pearl answered with an apology.

“I’m sorry… Last week, I assumed the worst of you. I think you were actually telling the truth and inexplicably, you don’t have an ulterior motive like everyone else who started watching me like that. I may have overreacted.” 

She pauses for a moment, scratching a non-existent itch on the back of her head. After quickly going over exactly what happened for yet another time this evening, she amends her statement. “No, no, I _definitely_ overreacted. Skating like this, though, it’s… Well, I don’t want to get into specifics, so let’s just say it’s something personal and very special to me. But you didn’t know that, and you also really weren’t doing anything wrong. So again, I’m… I’m sorry.”

Pearl kept her face forward, but kept moving her eyes to glance over at the cashier. She wasn’t positive, but she thought she saw a slight smile emerge on the smaller girl’s face.

“Thanks for the skates,” the cashier said. The silence settled over them again briefly as they circled the pond again. But the cashier eventually spoke again. “I’m Amethyst.”

The taller girl smiled. “It’s nice to meet you Amethyst. My name is Pearl.”

“Yeah, I saw your note. You got nice handwriting.”

Pearl let out a giggle through her nose. “Thank you. I so rarely get to put it to good use, I’m glad I’m not rusty.”

“Eh, writing by hand is overrated. Everything’s on a computer anymore, it’s not really an important skill nowadays. Unless you can make it pretty like yours, I mean. Seriously, that was like some kinda medieval calligraphy.”

“Well,” Pearl said through a smile, “I’m afraid I lack the proper metal-tipped dip pen, but I believe I made due with a Sharpie.”

That elicited a laugh from Amethyst, and Pearl felt the weight of guilt lifting off her shoulders almost immediately. 

“So… Do you live nearby?” Pearl asked.

“Uhh… No. No I don’t. I’m a convenience store cashier, Pearl. I can’t afford a single _room_ in any of the McMansions in this town, let alone an entire house. I got an apartment down South a ways, though. Ever been to Boothberg?”

Pearl hummed for a moment. “I think so…” Her sentence inflected upward, almost like she was asking a question. “Is that the touristy place with the strange new age gothic ornaments and the marijuana paraphernalia on display?”

Amethyst laughed in earnest this time. “Yep. That’s the one. Though, seriously, that place is kinda kickass. They sell like, medieval weapons ‘n junk too. I almost bought one for Christmas, but the siren’s call of a Nintendo 64 won out.”

Pearl’s smile returned. “Yes, I know about the weapons. I bought one about three years ago. Hasn’t let me down yet.”

“Oh, no way! Damn, you’re actually kind of a cool chick. Not that I thought you were lame, it’s just… Eh, let’s say I’ve had bad experiences with ice skaters before.”

Pearl seemed contemplative for a moment. They were quiet as they passed the Camaro for the second time in the loop.

“Well… On behalf of all figure skaters, I apologize for our behavior. I know we can get kind of self-obsessed and mean to the people we care about, especially when we have ambitions of a grand nature. It’s lonely at the top, as they say, and we have a tendency to take that to an extreme.”

Amethyst raised an eyebrow at how oddly specific that was. “Uhh, I dunno about all _that,_ but thanks I guess.”

There was another beat of silence, during which Pearl was inwardly cringing. Oversharing could be a problem when you didn’t really have anyone to vent to. Luckily for her, Amethyst fired off a question of her own.

“So P, what do you do for a living? Must be somethin’ pretty cool to be able to afford such a nice car. Dunno about the color, I’m more of a purple gal, but still, a Chevy Camaro? That’s a sweet ride.”

Pearl cringed inwardly, and voice raised almost an octave as she tried to answer. “O-oh, you know… A bit of this and a bit of that, mostly odd jobs lately, s-so what kind of music do you like?!”

Amethyst immediately thought that was suspicious and weird, but figured it wasn’t really her place to pry into a stranger’s personal life. If Pearl didn’t want to talk about it, then much like the skating, Amethyst wasn’t going to press for details.

“Mmm… Really like the stuff coming out of Seattle. Grunge is so much different than anything from before, it’s so honest and gritty. I like Nirvana, Alice in Chains and all that, but my favorite by far is Pearl Jam. How about you? More of a hip-hop girl?”

“Oh, no, nothing so modern. I’ve been more partial to the bands from the last decade. Cyndi Lauper, Madonna, Duran Duran, et cetera. Though Prince was always the one I adored the most.”

Amethyst was quietly laughing to herself. She couldn’t believe it. “Are… Are you serious right now? Wow, okay… Didn’t know this pond was a time machine.”

“Oh, hush, musicians back then were incredibly skilled and the songs were so upbeat and happy! Not like today where everything is doom-and-gloom and heroin.”

“Psh, the whole reason music changed was _because_ of that upbeat sound. Nobody feels that way all the time, so the cocaine binges the parents of yesteryear went on gave way to the depressed and angsty kids of today! And boy, do _they_ have some problems they wanna get off their chests. It’s honest, it’s gritty, and more than anything, it’s real.”

“Oh, now, that’s not fair at all! The Smiths had so many songs about loss and longing, and Prince was always brutally honest when he wanted to be. Didn’t you ever see ‘Purple Rain’ in the theater? Or even on television? The scene where he plays Darling Nikki in front of the girl he loves makes me cry every single time.”

Immediately after finishing her defense of 80s pop, Pearl became worried. She thought maybe she went too far when she put down Amethyst’s favorite music, one of the few things that people hold so dear to themselves. Sure, Amethyst kind of started it, but Pearl was supposed to be _nice_ to her tonight. But before Pearl could get too wrapped up in her own feelings, the younger girl said something that took her off guard.

“Wow…”

Pearl looked over and saw Amethyst almost blushing. “What…?” She said in response.

“Well, ah… I dunno, I just never really heard anyone as passionate about their music as I am. Does Prince really make you cry…?”

She looked over at Pearl expectantly, and Pearl nodded slowly with a raised eyebrow. Amethyst quickly looked away, her blush getting slightly more intense. Was she nervous?

“I mean… I get it. Eddie Vedder’s made me cry a few times too, so…” She trailed off.

Pearl felt strange being so vulnerable with a girl she only formally met about half an hour ago, but there was something about Amethyst that just made her feel at ease. It was like Amethyst gave off an aura of kindness that just wasn’t around all that much anymore. It was a feeling that Pearl hadn’t experienced before. She’d had a lot of antagonistic people in her life, but for once, someone was just friendly with no malicious intent. It was a feeling she could get used to.

The silence had grown between them again, and that made Pearl worry yet again. She didn’t want to make Amethyst uncomfortable, but she wasn’t the best at this sort of thing. When worry found its way into Pearl’s mind, she had a tendency to make mistakes. This moment was no exception.

“So Amethyst, what do you want to do with your life?”

She kicked herself mentally. What the Hell was that?! What kind of person just throws that question at someone else during their first decent interaction together?

“Whoa, alright there. Gettin’ kinda deep tonight. That’s a bit of a personal question, don’tcha think?”

Pearl cringed and tried to change course. “Oh, it’s okay, you don’t have to answer if you don’t want to.”

Amethyst just chuckled. “Nah, I will. But that means I get to throw a hardball your way too.”

Well, Pearl gave her an out and she didn’t take it. She thanked the stars that she hadn’t screwed up too badly.

“Well,” Amethyst began, “To be honest with you, professionally, I don’t care. I know how that sounds, but it’s true. I’m not _un_happy working here. It gives me enough money to buy the things I need with enough extra to get me the things I just plain want. But like, philosophically or whatever? I guess I just wanna spread some good feelings around. There’s a lotta pain everywhere I go. I figure if I can help someone get rid of even a tiny bit of that pain, then I’m doing okay. Like, okay, so you know how churchy people think if they’re a good person and read the bible they’ll get into some great big paradise in the sky? Well why can’t we try to make _this_ place paradise? I dunno, I guess I just like making other people happy. It makes me feel good. If I can do that, then I’m all set… Sorry, I know that got kinda weird there for a sec, but I mean, y’know, you asked.”

Pearl’s free hand was on her heart as she stared over at the smaller girl, who was looking away in embarrassment now. But Pearl couldn’t help herself. Sure, it was a cheesy and idealistic philosophy, but it was still just so admirable.

“I don’t think it’s weird at all. I think it’s really sweet. If we had more people like you in the world, then maybe this really _could_ be paradise.”

She squeezed Amethyst’s hand a little tighter.

“Okaysonowit’smyturnright?” The petite girl’s words escaped in a nervous blur, which made Pearl laugh a little. She nodded in the affirmative, worrying ever so slightly at what Amethyst might ask. The obvious choice was what this midnight-skating really meant to her and why it was so important. That would be okay, she supposed. It’s not like Amethyst _knew_ any of the people in that story. It might make things a tad uncomfortable, but once you tell someone that Prince makes you cry, that barrier’s pretty much already broken.

“Okay… So Pearly, brace yourself; do you have a boyfriend?”

Well that was… Unexpected. How could she answer that? Honestly, she supposed. What’s the harm?

“Me? Oh, no. No, never.” She hoped that wasn’t too obvious. It was the 90’s and people were more open to what she was implying, but one could never be too careful. She didn’t want to come out fully if she didn’t have to, and she thought maybe her answer was vague enough to be overlooked.

Of course, this wasn’t the case.

“Really now? Hm…” Amethyst seemed oddly contemplative. Her hand slowly released from Pearl’s. She stuck her arms out a ways to keep balanced, but she didn’t fall over. Her form was a marked improvement from before.

“Alright, well, it’s getting pretty late. I gotta head home.” She started skating toward the hill she climbed down.

Pearl felt a pang in her heart. Things were going so well, she didn’t want the night to end like this. Did Amethyst figure it out? Is that why she took her hand away? Oh, of course, it had to be. It was understandable, of course she would be uncomfortable after that. It would be selfish of Pearl to try to keep her here.

“Oh, alright... Well, I hope you enjoyed yourself. You know, for your first time, you actually weren’t too bad.”

“Thanks.” She replied as she reached the hill and began to scale it. “Oh, and don’t worry about the boyfriend thing, I really do gotta get home. I-I don’t wanna freak you out, I just- I mean… Ok, let me put it this way, I’m pretty sure you just told me you’re a Thelma. And if I’m not completely misreading that whole situation, then I guess you could call me Louise. See you tomorrow!”

As Amethyst made her way to her car, Pearl stumbled pretty badly. She put that comment together fully, her face as red as a fire hydrant. Pearl didn’t have the money to see too many movies lately, but as gay as she was, she couldn’t resist scrounging up five dollars to see Thelma and Louise.

She couldn’t believe what just happened. The knot in her heart had untied completely, but the string that made it had started flailing around wildly in her stomach. It was a sensation not dissimilar to butterflies. The reason why Amethyst let go became mildly clearer. Because they were “compatible,” a word that Pearl surmised was suitable to use, Amethyst didn’t want anything happening on false pretenses. This was an action that would have bewildered Pearl if it came from anyone else. But of course Amethyst would be so considerate. After the whole “spread some good feelings” thing, it made sense.

But Pearl didn’t really want to entertain the idea that Amethyst had any kind of feelings for her. She was fairly certain about it, but Pearl wasn’t in a good place for a relationship. She missed being in love with someone more than anything, and all of Amethyst’s philanthropic ambitions certainly made an impression on Pearl, but unless something drastic changed in her life, she wouldn’t make a move. She couldn’t do that to such a nice person. She never wanted to be anyone’s problem, and she wasn’t going to start now.

Pearl skated mindlessly around the circle for another hour or so. When it was a bit past 2:00 AM, the numbness had set in deeply enough that she decided it was time for bed. She circled around the pond a final time before shakily sitting down in the front seat of her car. With the door still open and her legs still hanging out, she untied and removed her figure skates. They were placed softly in the passenger seat before she closed the door and clicked the button below the window that locked everything. She turned off her high beams before inserting her keys and starting the engine, immediately causing air to begin flowing out of the vents. She was hoping to at least heat her car up a bit before going to sleep. 

Pearl sat in the front seat for another thirty minutes, not doing anything but thinking about the events of the previous hour and a half. When the temperature inside had risen to somewhere around 65 degrees, she turned off her engine. She daintily climbed into the back seat of her Camaro, carefully avoiding anything breakable. There was a moderately heavy blanket waiting for her along with a well used pillow that had no case on it. She wrapped herself up in the comforter and did her best to lie down in the confined space. 

Tonight, sleep came to Pearl more easily than it usually did.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Special thanks to Bittersweet_Romanticide for beta reading!
> 
> Also, you may have some questions. That's fine, that's intentional. The big ones will be answered in due time. I just want everyone to experience the story the right way.


	3. Chloe Dancer

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I LIVE AGAIN! Sorry for the long-ass delay, even before all the pandemic stuff, I got appendicitis and had to get it removed. Things got put on the back burner for a while, but I always chipped away at this story. It's a bit shorter, but that's only because what I have planned next worked better on its own, IE, I have more coming. Thanks to Hadithi <https://universallywriting.tumblr.com/>/ and loveluckylost <https://loveluckylost.tumblr.com/>/ for beta reading!
> 
> ALSO DOUBLE THANKS TO LUCKY FOR THE FAN ART OMFG IT'S SO GOOD I'm putting it at the beginning.  
CW for attempted sexual assault.

  
  
On the night of February 4th, 1997, Amethyst’s living room was bathed in the blue light of her television set. On the screen was a Han-Solo knockoff, Dash Rendar, who Amethyst was controlling with the oddly shaped Nintendo 64 controller. She was somehow able to make him navigate the oversized sewage pipes with ease, a difficult feat considering she was talking on the phone at the same time. The cord reached all the way from her kitchen to the couch she was laying on, the rubber-wrapped coil of copper forming a loose limbo bar that prevented entry into the hallway. Briefly, her brain wondered why the controller didn’t reach nearly as long, forcing her to have the console on her coffee table and a mess of wires leading to the TV behind it, but she was too preoccupied to follow that train of thought. Luckily, the person on the other end derailed it.

“Okay, so she’s a skater, big whoop. I still don’t get why you’re so obsessed with her.”

Amethyst pulled back the singular analog stick and prevented her character from floating into a saw blade that protruded out of the wall in the Imperial Sewer. Why an oversized power tool was in the sewers in the first place was a question only the Emperor had the answer to, and he wasn't talking.

“I dunno, Peri, there was just something about her that made me stop and stare for a whole hour. I didn’t even move, I just watched.”

“Pff, okay, Ghostface, I’ll tell the police to keep an eye on Drew Barrymore.”

“Dude, no spoilers! You know there aren’t any theaters where I live, I gotta wait ‘til Blockbuster has it!”

“Oh, right, because the commercials didn’t show you who was in the movie.”

With Peridot’s sarcastic quip, poor Dash Rendar met his doom at the hands of a stormtrooper, setting Amethyst’s progress back to her most recent checkpoint.

“Damnit, Peridot, you made me lose a guy.”

“Oof, sorry… I haven’t played it, but I keep reading one of the biggest issues is how far back it puts you if you die. Sorry, I’ll pull back. But you still have to tell me about this skater. All you told me is that she’s pretty, but it’s hardly a descriptor. Do you even know if she’s a lesbian?”

“I dunno, she blushed pretty hard at a ‘Thelma and Louise’ reference. I think it’s pretty safe to assume.”

“Oh wow. Did I tell you Lazuli and I cried in the theater when we saw that one?”

“Oh yeah? How’s ol’ blue doing, anyway? Haven’t really talked to her since high school. She was always more your friend than mine.”

“She’s doing great, actually. Her art is getting some buzz from more than just college kids lately. Who knows, she might actually start showing at a gallery soon.”

Amethyst chuckled. “Yeah, that sounds like her. It’s weird, even though she and I have a lot in common, I kept wanting to hang out with you back in those days. I wonder why that was.”

“Mmm, if I had to guess, I’d say you thought you had a better chance at getting into _my_ pants.”

Amethyst’s next sentence died on her lips, her surprise sending poor Dash Rendar into the blaster of an imperial guard, costing yet another life.

“What the fuck, Peri…”

“What?” Peridot said, barely masking a laugh. “It’s true and you know it.”

Amethyst sighed. “Yeah… I guess. But that’s forever ago, and you’re super happy with Lapis. It feels… I dunno, weird.”

Peri groaned. “Fine…”

A cacophony of grunts and banging could be heard coming from a TV on the other end of the phone, followed by a long sigh.

“I should have listened to you and destroyed that tape. Looks like RAW was terrible last night. False advertising really sets me off.”

“Told ya, dude, they weren’t just gonna give away a whole pay-per-view. WCW is the better promotion anyway.”

The TV on the other end turned off.

“Alright, so tell me more about her. I’m all ears. She’s pretty, she’s skinny, she can ice-skate, she yelled at you but felt bad and got you some skates, she held your hand, what else?”

While Peridot spoke, Amethyst rummaged through a bag of nacho cheese Doritos, stuffing her face immediately after she grabbed a handful of corn chips. A polite person wouldn’t speak with their mouth full. Amethyst was not one of them.

“She’f fuper kyoot, an reary nishe, an aye fink we’re confafavel.”

“Amethyst, please, I don’t speak slob.”

Amethyst made a loud swallowing noise and washed it down with some Mountain Dew, which she was drinking directly from a two-liter bottle.

“Sorry, P-dot, I said I think we’re compatible. Like I went on a spiel about the way I wish the world worked, and she was super into it. It was… Kind of refreshing, really. I might finally make a friend besides you…”

“Hmm… I’m not so sure, Amethyst, it sounds like you see her as something a bit more than a friend.”

That remark sent Dash straight into the large tentacles of the level's final boss, bringing his life counter all the way down to zero and sending Amethyst back to the start of the level.

“No, Peridot. That’s a dead end, we both know that.”

“Actually, no, I really _don’t_ know that. You have so much more to offer than you give yourself credit for, Amethyst. I wish you could see that…”

“Yeah, well, tell that to my parents. They clearly didn’t think I had anything to offer.”

“Don’t let people you don’t even know define who you are.”

“Oh yeah? How about my sister? We both know _her_ pretty well.”

“... Okay, well, I’m not putting up with this anymore. I’ll call you when I’m free again.”

“...Wait, Per-” she was cut off by the sound of a phone being slammed down onto its receiver.

Amethyst sat up on the couch, letting crumbs fall from her chest onto the floor. She might vacuum them up later. Or not. Not like anyone really cares. As her eyes began to sting with unshed tears, she threw the phone toward the kitchen, the tension in its cord making it whip into a wooden cabinet door that shielded her glasses and mugs from being shattered.

It was unfair. Peridot was trying to help, and Amethyst just had to go and fuck it up. Who knew when Peridot would have another day off? CTO’s were almost always busy. Even if she did manage to get another free evening, after all that, would she even want to spend it on the phone with Amethyst?

Amethyst hung her head. She screwed the cap back onto the bottle of Mountain Dew, rolled up the bag of chips, turned off her Nintendo 64, and guiltily put the phone back on its receiver. She was very lucky nothing had broken in her fit of rage. A small sigh escaped her mouth. A breaking bottle sounded through the still Winter air from the club down the street as she slowly walked her lonesome path down the hallway into her bedroom.

She was quiet as she moved. Though most of her neighbors had gone South for the Winter, earning them the affectionate title of “snowbirds” from anyone who lived in Maine year-round, she tried hard not to make a sound. She didn’t want the world to know she was there. Perfect isolation.

Her thoughts drifted to Pearl as she laid her half-naked body on her mattress on the floor. The Mountain Dew and angry outburst had unfortunately rendered her much too wired to sleep. She blindly reached into the drawer on the bottom of her bedside table and pulled out a cheap, plastic vibrator, the purple plastic having faded away over time, making it almost match the lilac of her hair.

The whistle of a train rang through the night from far away as she tore open a condom wrapper and placed the latex prophylactic on the toy. It meant less cleaning once the deed was done. She let out a grunt of annoyance as well as sensitivity as she slid the vibrator inside of her. There was only marginal pleasure in this. Masturbation this late at night for her served only as a means to an end. It made her tired long before her usual bedtime of about 3:00 AM, and she really didn’t want to be awake anymore..

She closed her eyes and turned the vibration to low, one of only three intensity settings. She was lucky it had more than one, frankly. She thought vividly of the sweet nothings Pearl might whisper into her ear, the words “cute” and “sweet” being the most used. Though she thought herself hideous, it was nice to pretend. Her imagination was so vivid at times, she could almost hear Pearl calling her an angel.

The train was moving closer to her apartment, the horn whispering quietly through her silent abode. She moved the knob up to medium for a few seconds before pulling it back down for another short burst. She alternated between the two, trying to ride the waves closer toward climax. Her fantasy had become more vivid, with her head between Pearl’s legs in the back seat of that classic sports car. Soft gasps of pleasure were masked by the sound of the railroad crossing lowering its barriers and sounding off its warning bells. She was getting close, she was hitting all the right spots. It had become more of a science than anything else, a confession she would never make for fear of how pitiful they’d believe her to be.

She shook her head clear, trying to refocus onto Pearl. She could almost feel her head being lightly squeezed by those two pale, milky thighs, glistening in the light of the moon through the Camaro’s rear windshield.

“_Amethyst, please, I need it in me, I need_ you _ in me!”_ Pearl’s voice sang out in the shorter girl’s fantasy, causing her to stick her tongue out in a successful attempt to make it more real. The train had come within half a mile of her apartment by now, the steam whistle blaring, making the “high” setting of her vibrator sound almost silent by comparison. Her climax was building, coming just as fast as the locomotive.

Her apartment shook as the steam engine rumbled past, screaming into the night as Amethyst did the same. She stopped spasming before her room did. As the train began heading away from her, her pulse had begun to slow. Before her breathing had slowed back down to normal, she removed the toy from inside of her, wincing as she did so. She pulled the condom off of it and tossed it into the trash before placing the vibrator back in the drawer it was taken from.

Mission accomplished. Now all she had to do was fall asleep before the tears came.

Her final thoughts as she faded into unconsciousness were of holding Pearl.

_~  
~~  
~~~  
~~  
~_

Pearl sat in her car, staring up at a bright neon sign that read “The Rose Garden.” It was almost 9 o’clock at night. She knew she had to start moving, but her legs seemed to fail her at this moment in time. There was a lot to unpack in the name of that club that she just didn’t have time for. If just seeing the word “rose” was enough to do this to her, she wasn’t going to get very far in life. But tonight she felt justified in her petrification.

She reached over to the stack of folded skimpy clothes she had prepared and brought them close, holding them tightly to her chest. She never took her eyes off of the sign, and it bathed her entire face in alternating colors of pink and green as the sign played its pseudo-animation of a blooming rose. She didn’t want to be here, oh God, did she not want to be here, but she didn’t have a choice. Anxiety began to take over as her breath started to quicken. Tears ate at the edges of her eyes, stinging just enough to be noticable. Rose had been gone for years now, and Pearl couldn’t believe what she was resorting to. She was nothing without Rose, it wasn’t fair, why did that awful man have to take her away? Without him, Rose would still be here, and Pearl wouldn’t be sitting in front of a strip club gathering the courage to go inside. But the money was too good to pass up, it was a necessity at this point, and if she didn’t get it, the weather forecast on the radio-

”Easy. Breathe. All the way in and then all of it back out. Find yourself again. Take control once more. You’re going to be okay…”

The words repeated in her head, over and over. She knew that voice so well, and she hated that it made her feel so safe. She hated that part of her picked this particular club because of the name. There were other clubs that were easier to get to and less of a waste of gasoline, but Pearl’s subconscious associated this particular flower with safety so much that the yellow pages she studied hours before might as well have been a post-it note with a single listing.

Her breathing had finally steadied. It was quite literally do or die, something she kept repeating to herself as she stepped one patent leather high-heeled foot onto the pavement, stack of clothing in hand. One last look in the mirror at her almost perfect makeup, and then she was away.

No turning back now.

Her heels clicked with every step, echoing into the quiet of the frosty evening. Snow had begun to fall yet again, and that strange muffled silence permeated the air. Soon, she had rounded the corner and was approaching the front door. The only thing in her way now was a single drunk man relieving himself onto the bricks of the club.

As she came closer to him, he seemed to recognize the sounds of high-heels and he turned to face her.

All of him.

Pearl stumbled back to avoid being urinated on and she looked up at him with disgust on her face, though the man was much too drunk to really care.

A goofy-yet-menacing smile spread across his face.

“Ohhhhh well now hey there pretty little thing…” he laughed with his mouth open, but it was quickly silenced as he took another swig from his green bottle. “Tell me, do ya like what ya see?”

“Ah… Excuse me, sir, but I’m not exactly, uhm… On the clock yet…?” Pearl tried to step back, but the man started coming closer to her at an angle, forcing her up against the piss-stained wall.

“Oooh, no worries, mama, see, I’m a paying customer. And you know the golden rule: the customer’s always right.”

Slowly, he came toward Pearl. Every inch he approached, Pearl became more panicked. She turned her head as his own face got much too close to her own. She kept her eyes averted, but could see his breath as it fogged up the window she was next to.

“N-no thank you, sir, I really must get i-inside!”

Another open mouthed laugh sounded before he began whispering into her ear.

“Ohh baby, you got it all backwards! I know you liked what you saw, so I think maybe I’m the one who needs to get inside, if ya know what I mean. How ‘bout you give him a little stroke, huh? I promise, he’s very friendly.”

She wanted to cry out for help. She wanted to knee him in the groin and kick him to the curb. She was far from helpless, she could take him no problem. He’d hit the street before he knew what was happening.

But the money…

Pearl let out a sad sigh and began to reach down, her shame building with every inch. She tried to think of a better place, a better time. She tried to imagine she was somewhere else, like she usually did when she was trying to sleep in her Camaro. Usually her thoughts were filled with Rose.

She thought of holding hands with Amethyst on the pond, snow falling around the both of them.

Before Pearl made contact, she heard a cry of pain that shook her out of the trance she was attempting to put herself in. She looked up and saw the man’s hair being yanked backward by a large woman with an impeccable afro.

“Kevin,” she said simply with her British accent, “we just had this discussion inside. Just because you no longer need a fake ID doesn't mean your ban is suddenly lifted. You are to leave this property and never return. Though if you’d rather have that discussion with the police instead, I’m positive they’d love to hear about all of this.”

Pearl started breathing again. She didn’t even realize she had stopped, everything was just too much for her to handle.

The man struggled. “Heyy, lemme go, you bitch!”

The larger woman shook her head. “I think maybe you need to be reintroduced to the street.”

She tossed him effortlessly into the barren road, leaving the man a drunken heap in the slush and gravel mixture. He began screaming obscenities and quickly rose to his feet, spoiling for a fight, but the sight of a newly-wielded can of mace made him think twice. He glared at the bouncer for almost a full thirty seconds before sloppily ambling down the snowy sidewalk, away from The Rose Garden and, more importantly, away from Pearl.

The unfamiliar woman didn’t take her gaze off of Kevin as she talked to the object of his drunken obsession.

“I apologize for not being here sooner. I didn’t realize he was still out here until I saw you both through the window. Tell me if you need to use our phone, I’d understand.”

Pearl, still shivering both from the cold and that insane encounter, could barely speak. But with her remaining strength, she pressed on. “N-no, thank you… I-I was actually hoping I could um… I could dance here. For money.”

The bouncer turned around and began studying Pearl. There was silence between them almost long enough to make it awkward, but then the bouncer spoke again.

“Tell me your name.”

Pearl immediately realized she hadn’t thought of a stripper name. Nobody would want to see someone named “Pearl” dance, they’d think she was an old, wrinkly geriatric coming straight from hospice care. She needed something better, she knew that, but she was too shaken to really think straight.

“...Chloe…!” she blurted out. Her eyes started to sting again, her breath started to quicken, she tried to bring her mantra back to her mind, but a hand on her shoulder brought her back to the present.

“Easy there. Breathe. In and out, slowly. My name is Garnet. I’d like to hear you say it.”

“G-G-Garnet…” Pearl was able to say.

“Good. Very good. ‘Chloe,’ what just happened to you wasn’t okay. And it’s okay if you’re not able to perform after that. Go home, recuperate. Make a cup of hot chocolate, watch a movie, cope however you can. Come back another night. I promise Kevin won’t bother you again.”

Pearl’s approaching calm was swiftly pulled away from her.

“N-no, I, I can’t, I n-need the m-money, I need it or s-something b-bad will, ha… will h-happ-”

The tears started coming back and Garnet snapped her fingers. “Stay with me, breathe. In and out. Money, yes, I understand. Nobody should have to go through what just happened to you, so I’m going to help you.”

She reached into her pocket and pulled out two twenty dollar bills. She gently grasped Pearl’s hand and put the money into her palm, closing Pearl’s fingers around it before letting go.

“This is yours. You pay me back if you can. This isn’t a loan, this is a gift. I know dancers usually make more, but on a Monday night-”

She was cut off by a tearful hug from Pearl. Her soft crying had turned into a full on sob. Garnet quickly threw her arms around the girl and held her as she babbled unintelligibly.

“You’re going to be okay,” the bouncer said.

The embrace lasted for a few minutes before Pearl was able to pull herself away. She was able to center herself and found her ability to speak once again.

She wiped her eyes as she thanked her savior. “I can’t begin to tell you how much this means to me… I promise, when I can, I will pay you back every penny.”

Garnet didn’t respond. She knew that money wasn’t coming back to her. But that was okay.

Pearl cleared her throat and began to walk back to her car, forty dollars in hand.

“You’re an Angel, Garnet…” were Pearl’s last words to the bouncer before she turned the corner that led into the parking lot.

Garnet stood on the curb, watching as Pearl’s Camaro pulled out into the street and drove away. She waved as the tail-lights disappeared into the distance.

“Wow, G,” someone said as they walked out of the club. “I watched you through the window. That was somethin’ else… You know the boss ain’t gonna like you turning away fresh young talent like that.”

“You know I don’t care, Bismuth.”

Bismuth was quiet for a moment before she burst out laughing. “Hah! Yeah, I do. Come to think of it, neither do I! C’mon, let’s get back inside before our asses freeze.”

**Author's Note:**

> I had this image of Pearl skating on a frozen pond in the middle of a snowstorm and the rest of the story came from there. I actually have a lot of backstory and planning written out already, which is totally not what I used to do. What can I say, ADHD meds are great. Hope you enjoy!


End file.
